I decided to combine a few post ideas that were not long enough into a single post. Why? Because I steal from C/K. I even stole the idea to start a blog from him.
One of my duties as a hotel night auditor is to print out the receipts for Choice Privileges customers and slip them under their doors. Traversing from one room to the next, quietly slipping receipts under doors, I wondered if this was what it felt like to be the Tooth Fairy. In any case, it has similarly creepy connotations: I am slipping things under other things for you to find while you are asleep.
Last night I not only read text in my dream, I made a play on words! I think I was looking at someone’s online username and they were an Olympic swim fan, because the word displayed was “Lochtepus.”
I have never heard that one before (only “Lochtess Monster”), so I am taking this opportunity to praise my subconscious’s cleverness.
CNN keeps referring to tonight as “debate night in America.” Because of the phrasing, I now have “Tennis Night in America” stuck in my head.
To bring things full circle, Ryan Lochte will be appearing in the final(?) season of 30 Rock. If anyone can make his stilted, wooden personality entertaining, it’s them.
30 Rock Soundtrack:
Stop trying to steal my life.
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